01 Brutally honest. Usefully funny.

Your brand.
No filter.

BrandRoast turns your website or social profile into a funny, useful scorecard—so you can see what your audience sees and fix what is holding you back.

Roast my brand How it works

Create a free account first, then submit one public URL. No card required.

brandroast.ai / scorecard

Brand score

64/100

Needs a little heat

Trust82

Design51

Personality77

Roast

“Your logo says luxury. Your website says free trial.”

Improve

Give the offer room to breathe, then lead with proof.

●Private by default

●Funny, not cruel

●Specific over generic

02 / the process

We say what others won't.

A sharp read on your public brand, without a six-week consulting deck.

Create your free account

Set up takes a minute. No card, no surprise paywall.

Submit one public URL

Paste a website or social profile you are happy for the AI to review.

Get roasted, then improve

Receive a scorecard and sharp observations. Unlock a full audit only if you want the fixes.

03 / made to be shared

Your scorecard is content. Your fixes are momentum.

Share the entertaining verdict, challenge another business, then keep the serious recommendations for your next round of improvements.

Generate my scorecard

Share preview

64/100

“You have the confidence of a premium brand and the navigation of a lost Ikea customer.”

Roast yours → BrandRoast

04 / clear pricing

Start with the joke. Pay for the glow-up.

The free scorecard is immediate after signup. Pay only when you want the practical improvement plan.

Quick Roast

A shareable reality check for your public-facing brand.

£0

Free account · no card

Overall score + 5–7 category scores
Three funny observations
One vertical share scorecard

Create free account

Best first fix

Full Audit

The serious layer: clear fixes, copy, and creative direction.

£9 one-off

Unlocked after your free roast

Everything in Quick Roast
Prioritised recommendations
Homepage copy and positioning
Colour, type, and 30-day plan

Unlock the useful layer

Brand Monitor

A regular check-in for brands that refuse to get stale.

£29/month

Monthly report · cancel anytime

Monthly analysis and scorecard
Fresh content recommendations
Progress tracking and next actions

Start monitoring

Need a full AI-generated brand makeover? Bespoke packages start at £99.

05 / FAQ

Fair questions. Straight answers.

Your brand can take it

One URL. One honest score. Zero jargon.

Create your free account, submit a public link, and see what your brand is really communicating.